Mongoose here to address my adoring public. It's been almost 2 weeks since my escape from captivity and there's been lots going on. First of all, my captors are strange people. The one called Mom seems to have some sort of disorder where she is all nice and attentive and then in an instant becomes cranky and weepy. She talks about needing some kind of regular sleep, whatever that is, and she uses language that she tells me not to listen to to curse something called hormones. The one called Dad seems openly baffled that I make a racket at night. Note to self, learn more about this 'night' character and how to use it for evil.
Here I am escaping the jaws of some beast that apparently likes the taste of babies. May try and befriend this beast in the future once I gain control of my neck. I can sense a symbiotic relationship that might get me out of trouble in the future and provide alternative food sources for the beast.
Here's a shot of me after my captors have stretched me on the rack. Ok, they didn't actually stretch me, they did feed me steroids however. Believe me, I'm about to go into 'roid rage at ANY moment.
What's next for the Mongoose? A bath?!? Send help...
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